Protecting Your Biggest Treasure

| Protect | 

to cover or shield from exposure, injury, damage, or destruction 

Defining the word is the easy part, but how is it done? How do you protect your heart? That's the part we wrestle with. What I've learned is that there is a common extreme we fall into. We build 100 foot walls around our sweet little hearts with loaded cannons at the ready. There might also be a moat inhabited by a float of crocodiles, depending whatever suits your fancy. This extreme defense is developed through a misunderstanding of the meaning of "protect". Carrying a heart that vidvidly remembers the last time it was hurt, we seek refuge. However, the bricks making up these walls were formed in the fires of fear and mistrust. Walls that behind which we are actually hiding more than we are healing. It's intimidating, but lowering these barriers and letting people in is a necessity.  This is where the dance of vulnerability comes in. I call it a dance because it takes time to learn, and even after years of practice it can be difficult. Breaking down the Fortress of False Security requires this vulnerability with those in our lives. Best described in the words of a teacher of mine, this is done by "putting our hearts out on the table in front us, and trusting the person on the other side." Saying that, this process of letting people in needs to be done with regard to our emotional safety.

Coming home for Christmas, my bruised heart was dreaming of restoration in my father and my strained relationship. I'd started letting many people into my heart and my tall walls were slowly but surely becoming rubble beneath my feet. I knew I should play it safe, but the "Oh I'm sure it'll be okay, give your dad a chance,” coming from many trusted directions made my caution appear cowardly. My heart debated with itself...

Am I being selfish? 

Is my past hurt clouding my judgement? 

Should I just give him the benefit of the doubt?

Thankfully, so clearly did the Holy Spirit shine through the clouds of confusion: I'd just spent the past four months learning how to listen to my heart and the difference between vulnerability and putting myself in harms way. I had come to learn the true application of my leader’s advice: practicing vulnerability does NOT equate to putting my heart on the table across from someone holding a selection of paring knives. While trusting requires stepping outside our comfort zones, it does not call for the removal of our safety nets. We will never be outside of God’s complete protection amidst His perfect direction. Keep asking Him, keep seeking Him, and never stop listening for Him. He is faithful to direct us.

Let’s back up and revisit that definition of protect. The words used to describe the act of protection were "cover" and "shield". Even though there are many synonyms for these two words, ones like "hide" and "smother", none of them were used in the definition of protect. The connotations they carry are near opposites. I don't see that as coincidence. Protection doesn't call us to act through words shrouded in weakness. The protection of our biggest treasure calls us to be clothed in words of power and confidence. We are to cover ourselves with the glory of God and shield our hearts through our faith in His protection.

Create a space for your heart to reside, but don't build indestructible walls forged in fear. Be vulnerable with yourself and others, but don't take your heart somewhere it wouldn't be safe. Hold yourself high regard, as if you possess the Hope Diamond in your chest. Walk with boldness knowing you are under the shelter of the presence of God, the creator of the universe.